I feel I should post this but no one is reading this so its okay

a poem/letter to ambient musicians that will never be mailed electronically or manually april 7 2009

please come to my shitty town and perform

it may seem expensive

it may seem unnecessary

it may seem like a lot of effort and

if you look at the performance in the ‘negative’ ‘short run’, you would be coming a long way to only make five people ‘happy’

if you look at the performance in the ‘positive’ ‘long run’, you would be coming a long way to make five people ‘happy’, who would in turn, become influenced to make five more people ‘happy’ themselves, thus making twenty five more people ‘happy’ including of those original five

that would make 30 people ‘happy’

that would make more people ‘happy’ than most people can make ‘happy’ in a lifetime

at this point, i am considering that those 30 ‘happy’ people become greedy and keep their ‘happiness’ to themselves

i will stop considering this because that would be uncharacteristic of ‘happy’ people

therefore, raise the amount of ‘happy’ people to 5^*

where ‘*’ is the number of musicians i convince to play in my shitty town

the ‘happy’ will spread exponentially

i realize i use the word ‘happy’ loosely and do not have much connotation for the word and could replace that word with a numerous amount of other words

content, fulfilled, and euphoric, and

(checking thesaurus now for even better words) jovial, rapturous, blithe

but i am a simple man with simple desires and somewhat simple thought processes

it keeps me ‘happy’

it keeps me busy too

but i will make room in my schedule for your performance

Magnetic Fridge Poetry by Good Brains

baby,

   if I told you your body be sexy

   can I get sex please?

        can I buy you up?

        want it fast? 

        would you like money?

I may feel the best looking organ in here

oh and I’m the only thing missing in you

       your clothes would come off and my dreams would look great

my sugar woman

love my heart somewhere

       but don’t believe in an angel like this

you’re looking like you have a beautiful body

hold it good

       haven’t we only one?

Vitamin Water

Woke up ridiculously hungs this morning. Ironically enough, went to a party last night and they played Girl Talk to ‘start a dance party’. Decided to black out at that point. Now it’s 4:37 and I am still in bed. Got up briefly to get Vitamin Water and was pleasantly surprised to see a new flavor. tranquilo. Sadly reminded me of a pina colada, which then reminded me of alcohol, which then made me throw up. Wah wah. Poor me.

At least it inspired me to write this. 

‘How I Befriend Famous People” by Good Brains

I am going to T-Pain’s house and drinking all of his cognac 

I am going to Daft Punk’s house and tearing that motherfucker up

I am going to Steve Job’s house and stepping on his iphone

I am going to 50 Cent’s house and stealing his Vitamin Water

Vitamin Water, Vitamin Water, Vitamin Water, Vitamin Water, 

Vitamin Water, Vitamin Water, Vitamin Water, Vitamin Water, 

I am going to Andy Warhol’s house and repainting his walls

I am going to Phil Elvrum’s house and dog earring the pages in the book he is reading

I am going to Russell Brand’s house and cutting his hair while he sleeps

I am going to Shaquille O’Neil’s house and stealing his Vitamin Water

Vitamin Water, Vitamin Water, Vitamin Water, Vitamin Water, 

Vitamin Water, Vitamin Water, Vitamin Water, Vitamin Water, 

This is the chorus, this is the chorus

You people bore us, so here is the chorus

This is the chorus, this is the chorus

You are Dora, please come explore us

This is the chorus, this is the chorus

We are energy, you people store us

This is the chorus, this is the chorus

And I hope this sums it up for us